Beginning to get addicted to blogging. This is bad. Feel so uneasy not recording down my thoughts each night. Has become somewhat a prerequisite for me to jot down my two cents worth each night before I sleep. So here goes.
Life has not been a bed of roses for me this year. In fact. It is probably the roughest year I have gone through so far. The emotional roller coaster. The drastic mood swings. The uncontrollable feelings. With each passing day it gets harder to hold on. True. Some things might have improved a bit. But there are others that have became worse.
Yet even at these desperate times. I no longer have the urge to seek Him. Even though I know that is what I should do. Seek Him first and all these will be added unto you. In fact. I am beginning to draw further away from Him. What am I doing.
The feeling of being so far away that you no longer know how to find your way back. Say a prayer they say. Wish I could. No longer know what to pray about. Just so many things messed up. At best I could only cough out a “help me”. I hope He hears me.
All I really want is some rest. Some closure. So that my heart will no longer be burdened and heavy. And that I may be filled with the joy of The Lord again. Amen.